What's Going On?

The first thing I remember you said to me is

"Do you like to party?"

"Yes, maybe a little too much.

We may have said a little more before this, but this is where it truly began. This alcoholic complicated modern quote on quote romance.

I had took two Tramadol, ready to go to sleep. I got a text:

"Hey meet us in Old Town."

I thought it over in a minute and said fuck it.

"I'll be there in twenty,"

I put on my tight black romper I bought at Charlotte Russe a week ago and called an Uber.

When I got there thinking it was going to be a group but it was only you and Ed. I felt anxious, only talked to either you a number of times. The night became a night to remember but forgotten. A theme common in our lives. It solidify our relationship.

Many drunk nights, many drunk conversations,

You always got angry at my foolish drunk mistakes (running off) and I never understood why.

Already drunk out of my mind, flashes of pink and red lights all around in the club:

"Hey lets get a drink."

The words to my drunk heart.

Blur
Blur
Blur

"What is this tension between us?"

"What?"

Lasers of pink and red,
blue and green,
white and gold.

Blur
Blur
Blur

I only remember your arms tightly around me and your hands laced with mine. Not knowing how but not caring.

Living in the moment.

You lightly biting my ear and I softly kissed your neck.

The next day pretending nothing ever happened.

Confused
Confused
Confused

Drunk again on Ed's floor with you cuddling me. This isn't me. This isn't you. You grab my boob. That's more like it.

"Your boobs are really nice."
I smile to myself
"I know."
"Wait till you get old."

I laughed grabbing at your belt. Could I cross this line? Do friends and lover coexist? I pushed you away, not caring to know. Going to pretend nothing happened again.